Some dude from Alberta switched genders to save money on car insurance. Gieco is reportedly switching out its male gecko, who's British for some unexplained reason, for a white field mouse ala Bianca from Disney's The Rescuers Down Under. Complete with Hillary Clinton-inspired pantsuit. Gotta keep that mascot business casually nauseating.

I view this story with a healthy dose of skepticism. But we've already seen a story where a man changed genders to retire early. Plus, this is Canada. Where Justin "I Feel Pretty" Trudeau (see This Video Wants You To Help Find Justin Trudeau Some Testicles and Video: Owen Benjamin Mocks Justin Trudeau Over His ‘Peoplekind’ Comments) would create a Department of Wokeness if he could. So

Talk about ProgressiveAF Insurance:

To change my gender on my auto-policy I needed to change my gender on my Driver’s License. To change my gender on my driver’s license I first needed to amend it on my birth certificate. So I called the Government of Alberta and they said they’d send me the forms to get the process started. After that she said they will send me another batch of forms which included a requirement being a physician must write a letter saying that I am a woman. I thought I was stopped right there. I don’t want surgery! I thought gender was a state of mind in Canada and Alberta now. I was let down, but thankfully I was mistaken. Gender is a state of mind in Canada and therefore Alberta.

As the form stated, I was allowed to change my Sex if my gender didn’t match my body. Doesn’t make much sense. But whatever. I followed the requirements: one being the doctor’s letter, and two getting an affidavit notarized. The whole process was easy. Overall, it costed me ~$100 to change my gender.

I am now a woman. I wasn’t one last year. As you could see, I received my new birth certificate that states I am officially a woman. After I changed my gender on my driver’s license (and also my Alberta Health care coincidentally) I called up my insurance company and they adjusted my rate. I now pay $1100 less for auto-insurance. I won. The end.

Sure, he may have saved money. But at what cost? It's not like being a woman is all cheap insurance and free drinks on Thursday night. By law, you can only make 70 cents on the loonie. Every time you open up Tinder you run the risk of unsolicited d*** pics that put yours to shame. Who knows, you may just look at Justin Trudeau and become pregnant through no fault of your own, then need a government-provided abortion. That's how these things happen. Right? Wait... right?!

How soon before other penis-betwixt the legs ladies figure out how to game the system, lower their insurance rates by identifying as ladies? On the opposite side, when will ladies identify as blokes to waltz right into the men's bathroom to draw pussy cartoons on the stall walls?

When gender is fluid and can mean whatever you want it to mean, all rules get chucked out the window with the cast iron frying pan because some dude who wanted to be a housewife pre-emptively broke an egg yolk. That's what happens.

~ Co-written by John Porter and Courtney Kirchoff

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