Like children and their pool floats, columnists are out to play in the waters of Hurricane Harvey. Long drafted articles feature lots of quotes and zero actual content litter the internet like useless flotsam and jetsam (see Of Course! Salon.com Now Says the National Anthem is Racist and MSNBC Host Asks Ted Cruz About Hurricane Sandy Amid Hurricane Harvey). So for the media, Tuesday.

But if you needed a guide on how to implement leftist logic regards disaster situations, CNN is here to help. A news source they are not. A source of "what not to do," they excel. Never let anyone tell you they're good for nothing.

Step numero uno: create conflict out of thin air. CNN provides a classic example.

Like Hurricane Katrina and Superstorm Sandy before it, Harvey may demonstrate just how much the man-made gales of political polarization has diminished the nation's capacity to forge common cause against even the fiercest natural disasters.

The first issue that will test the nation's unity is funding the recovery from the storm.

In 2005, Vice President Mike Pence, then a Republican congressman from Indiana, led an effort by House conservatives to offset any post-Katrina aid with offsetting budget cuts in other programs, including highway projects and the new Medicare prescription drug benefit. "We simply can't allow a catastrophe of nature to become a catastrophe of debt for our children and grandchildren," Pence said at the time.

Kudos to CNN for peppering their piece with "political polarization" and "diminished" in the same sentence. Big words are important. Makes the rambling sound more intelligent. But they're pulling an argument clean out of their glute crevice. CNN essentially said: "Conservatives are bad because they want to be responsible for monies rather than letting feelings fund pet pork projects." Related: MSNBC Host Asks Ted Cruz About Hurricane Sandy Amid Hurricane Harvey. It's a classic slight of hand for the left. If someone refuses to fund a thing (even if that thing won't actually help anyone but politicians) then that someone is a heartless heathen deserving of all the internet hate rage.

Got it? Good. Let's continue through CNN's guide on how to be irresponsible turd patties.

Step numero dos: call anyone who disagrees with you an ignoramus cockalorum.

Scientists remain leery of attributing any individual storm to climate change. But the dominant scientific consensus is that climate change is increasing the odds that storms will be more powerful and destructive.

President Donald Trump has dismissed climate change as a "hoax"; the Environmental Protection Agency is in the process of uprooting the major regulatory initiatives Obama undertook to reduce carbon emissions from power plants, cars and trucks. Trump also withdrew the US from the Paris global climate accord.

Antifa and CNN are working out of the same playbook. This chapter reads, "We don't want conflict, but let's start a conflict by bringing up past conflict." The subtext? "Trump is stupid, climate change is real, and everyone who disagrees is a moron."

Except, as stated numerous times by people who use their brain -- not their undercarriages -- for thought, "consensus" isn't science (read MYTH BUSTED: Climate Change 'Consensus of Scientists' Is Idiotic). There was once a time when all the scientists agreed, in a consensus, that Earth was flat. Followed by a consensus the Earth was the center of the universe. Followed by the consensus that Europe, Asia, and Africa were the only continents on Planet Earth. Can you see where I'm going with this?

Is man partially responsible for "climate change"? Maybe, we don't actually know. Is the solution to "climate change" higher taxes, bigger government, and fewer American rights? No. Is blaming an entire hurricane on Donald Trump and Mike Pence in any way reasonable? Also no. Is it a mystery why we mock CNN as regularly as Amy Schumer steals a joke? Shouldn't be.

Now let's run through some climate change myths:

Co-written by Nichole Cooper and Courtney Kirchoff

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