Bitter social justice shart gaskets get their happy feels from ruining other people's joy. Want to grill some meats for your family? Stop killing animals. Monster. Want to go for a run? How dare you mock disabled people. Do you like milkshakes? Milk is white. RACIST.

There's no winning with leftist cryberries, especially when it comes to feminists (see FEMINISM: Australian Columnist Wants to Legally FORCE ‘Stay-at-Home Moms’ to Work and Red-Pilled Laci Green Asks “Are There Only TWO Genders?” Tolerant Feminists ATTACK!). Everything is problematic. Celebrating the existence of children is no exception.

The unwanted uteri over at Cosmopolitan have a bit to say about the joys of motherhood. Exclude the joy.

... My discomfort with the gender-reveal party goes beyond my standard objection to fanfare surrounding gestational markers... we're reinforcing the archaic notion that a woman's value rests squarely in her ability to grow tiny humans.

Firstly, yes, women can create whole other HUMANS in the course of nine months. It's a miracle. Possibly the greatest thing a woman can do. It should be celebrated. Nobody is saying it's the only thing valuable about women, obviously. Don't be fooled by the bitter rant of an insecure cat lady.

For starters, gender-reveal parties don't actually reveal gender—they reveal anatomy. Gender is a wholly different thing, inextricably tied to the social constructs around it.

Projecting gender perceptions onto a fetus becomes especially thorny when you take into consideration that, globally, one in every 1000 to 1500 children is born with a visible form of Difference of Sex Development (DSD), which means being neither entirely male nor female.

Okay, so let's be generous here and say 1 in 1000 kids will be born with mixed genitalia. That's a microscopic percentage. Still, this gal demands we call off ALL the gender reveal parties in the HISTORY OF EVER! You know, in case 0.1% of babies get triggered by a party that happened while they were swimming in the womb. Better to be safe than sorry.

Some readers will roll their eyes at these arguments, I'm sure, complaining that America is overwhelmed with political correctness and that there's nothing wrong with some guns-or-glitter-themed fun before the birth of your baby. So instead consider this most basic criticism of the trend: It's a little, well, narcissistic. It exists, as one journalist put it, "at the intersection of All About Me Avenue and Oversharing Boulevard."

The problem is compounded for low-income families who cannot afford the price tag attached to these events (the specialty cakes, for one, can run as much as $1,000).

She's right about one thing.

People are allowed to enjoy things. Alas, such fun and happiness go against the rules of these crazed, impudent little wenches. This hag is grandstanding about what people should and shouldn't do with their children, but they're the narcissists. For wanting to throw parties. As told by a blogger who felt the need to enlighten the world with her angry, holier than thou typing.

Throwing a party for your baby is totes one percentish. Just kill the thing, it's better for the climate anyway.

Want to see more batshit crazy feminists? Peep the video below. Keep bleach nearby for thine eyes.

NOT SUBSCRIBED TO THE PODCAST? FIX THAT! IT’S COMPLETELY FREE ON BOTH ITUNES HERE AND SOUNDCLOUD HERE.