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PoliticsApril 28, 2022
Elon Musk Mixes It Up on Twitter: Torches WaPo, 'Pledges' to Put Cocaine Back in Coca-Cola
I find myself in a dilemma. On one hand, it would be a good idea for Elon Musk to lay low for a bit. Liberals and the media (but I repeat myself) have six months to ruin the Twitter sale, and they made it clear they are targeting his tweets. Discretion would be wise. Musk can wild out once they turn over the keys.
The problem is IF Musk did that, we'd be robbed of quality content when he mixes it up on the bird app. Like when it came to Wednesday's hit piece against him in the Washington Post. Musk could have been angry. Instead, he remembered he has more money than WaPo owner Jeff Bezos and landed a solid joke.
The Washington Post targets me relentlessly!
Their insults could be higher quality, but some are not bad. I gave them 3 stars on Yelp.
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) April 27, 2022
Twitter users have been asking Musk to buy and fix other companies. Some are less serious than others. There were a number of requests for Musk to buy Coca-Cola and put cocaine back into it. That's right, friends. Back in the day, it was made with cocaine. There was a more classic version than Coca-Cola Classic!
Musk digs the idea! (Yes, "fact" checkers. I know he's joking)
Next I’m buying Coca-Cola to put the cocaine back in
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) April 28, 2022
It wouldn't be an internet without a demand to bring back Firefly. Firefly was an overrated sci-fi show that lasted one season, has been off the air for twenty years, and some people haven't been able to move on with their lives. Though to be fair, the movie sequel Serenity was pretty dope. But if we're going to reboot an Adam Baldwin vehicle, I'd rather they do Chuck.
Musk didn't answer directly. However, he said he wouldn't mind some science fiction that has actual science and fiction in it.
Some sci-fi that actually features sci-fi would be great
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) April 28, 2022
The richest man in the world can do 99.86% of anything he wants. Even some goals are out of reach. To those of you hoping Elon Musk could fix McDonald's soft-serve machines, the man has his limits.
Listen, I can’t do miracles ok pic.twitter.com/z7dvLMUXy8
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) April 28, 2022
Adding to the entertainment of Elon Musk's Twitter use is not what's said, but what's implied. There are people working for the bird app who literally can't even right now. For every Tweet, an employee of Twitter dies a little more inside. It increases the enjoyment of Musk tweets by 69.420%
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