I guess it's gonna be a long, long time before we see Elton John back on Twitter. In what is his second most disappointing decision of 2022 behind re-recording "Tiny Dancer" with Brittney Spears, Sir Reg will no longer use the bird app because derpity derp... Elon Musk.

You're no doubt saying to yourself, "But Brodigan... Elton John has a Twitter?" I know, right? Or, someone on his PR team has @EltonJohn on their iPhone. There is a distinct possibility Elton doesn't know what a Twitter is, or that he left it today due to *squints eyes* "their recent change in policy which will allow misinformation to flourish unchecked."

I'm not sad for me as I glare at my copy of Honky Château. I'm sad for you youngbloods. You may not believe me when I tell you, but rock stars used to be cool. They used to be anti-establishment instead of shills for it. It's a bygone era. You would have loved it.

If Elton follows suit, he will continue tweeting for two years while he says farewell to the bird app. The giant pianist is in the midst of a farewell tour that has lasted over two years now. Rumor has it that next year he will be co-headlining with Kiss on the Monsters of Farewell Tours Tour.

The irony for John being chased away by an actual rocket man isn't lost on anyone. I mean, it's lost on Elton John and whoever sent the tweet for him. But the rest of us are deciding between Rocket Man, The Bitch is Back, or Goodbye Yellowbrick Derp jokes.

You are unable to delete your account without making a sweeping declaration about deleting your account. No cap. It's been in Twitter's terms of service since as far back as 2018.

It's hard to imagine how to fill the gaping hole Elton is going to leave. Being the avid Twitter user that he is, there must have been some nasty misinformation on his timeline to cause him to make such a drastic choice.

Godspeed, Elton John. You may be a virtue-signaling dinkus now, but I'll always remember you for "Mona Lisa's and Mad Hatters." They can never take that away from us.

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