The thing about hate crimes is... people like to fake them. A lot. Especially gay people. Aaand sometimes they take things too far. I know what you're thinking. Sometimes? More like all the times (see Gay Bar Owner Torched his Own Bar, Blamed it on Anti-Gay 'Hate'). They're gays, okay? They don't know how to do anything non-flamingly. Hence the whole "gay pride" thing. Sort of goes against their whole identity.

This guy is a shining example. He recently landed in the hospital as the victim of a "hate crime." Or so he claims.

YouTube personality Calum McSwiggan claimed to be the victim of a brutal hate crime on Sunday, yet an investigation by the Los Angeles police revealed he likely fabricated the entire incident.

The LA County Sheriff's Department told an entirely different story about the incident. Officers arrested McSwiggan on Sunday evening purportedly vandalizing a car, with no visible injuries to himself. According to the police report, McSwiggan was booked and confined in a cell by himself. He was only hospitalized after officers discovered him beating himself with a payphone located in the cell.

He says he was attacked by a few homophobes outside a gay bar. Turns out the police are telling a different story. Except instead of tears and Facebook posts to back up their claims, they have other things. Like proof. The closest thing to proof that Calum has is the 80 proof Grey Goose he was McSwigging at the gay club. You know, before he started beating himself in the face with a payphone.

There's a lot wrong with this entire scenario... But can we address something real quick? Gays seem to love playing the victim. Even if it means they have to victimize themselves (like how this Lesbian Cold-Cocks Herself to Raise Awareness About LGBT 'Hate.' Yes, Really...). Now that they're treated like everybody else, including in the eyes of the law, they need a new bone to pick. The biggest "act of homophobia" committed against the gay community turned out to really just be an act of Islamic terrorism. The truth is, gays aren't as ostracized as they once were. Obviously. Since now they're hitting themselves for attention.

Thus, they need to be special again. Publicly prancing about Speedo-clad with rainbow boas just isn't cutting it anymore. But (fake) hate crimes? That puts them back under the limelight, and "hetero-normative" people are the oppressors again. #LoveWins

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