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Politicians repeat talking points. Leaders take bold positions on controversial issues. You expect your candidates to speak out on the unaffordable cost of living under the current regime or the gangs of undocumented Democrats taking over apartment buildings. That's the least they should be doing. But JD Vance, even when we're this close to the most important election of eleventy lifetimes, isn't afraid to boldly speak out on controversial topics. Vance pledges that, if elected, he and Donald Trump will put an end to the scourge facing We the People.

Disgusting ice cream flavors.

I know what you're thinking. "But Brodigan, JD Vance is making a joke."

Maybe. And LOL, you said "butt." Without an independent fact check by an "independent" "fact" checker, I have no idea of knowing for sure if he is joking or making a serious policy proposal. This is not unlike when he made unverified claims that his young kids literally eat 98 eggs a week. I'm sure once journalsimers are done harassing Barstool Sports for laughing at a funny thing, they'll get right on that.

What I do know is that someone needs to put a stop to the act of turning things that should not be flavors of other things into flavors of those things. See Industry, Craft Beer. I had a Linzer Tart porter during the holidays last year that broke me.

It is possible Vance is only speaking out about the regional aspect of the monstrosity of skyline chili-flavored ice cream. Skyline Chili is a delicacy in Vance's home of Ohio. It would be like Long Island having a bagel or pizza-flavored ice cream. Or Chicago having an overrated pizza-flavored ice cream.

Should this be an official position of Trump-Vance -- again, without journalismers independently fact-checking this, I have no way of knowing for sure -- there is plenty of support throughout the Internets.

"This ice cream is an act of aggression," cried one user.

"That Ice Cream sounds like a threat to Democracy," declared another patriot.

"It is true. Project 2025 will make chili ice cream a felony," said a voter who ackshually read all 900+ pages of the policy paper.

Other X-Twitter users felt there were more pressing matters for JD Vance to be concerned with:

All joking aside, mental health breaks this close to an election are healthy for all of us. It's nice to see JD Vance enjoying himself. Refreshing, even. He has been the best part of the campaign these past few months. Here's hoping his social media will stay just as engaging once he is elected vice president.

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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn't writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.

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