You may ask yourself why you clicked this story knowing it contains eye rape. I can't answer that for you. I can't answer it for myself. But there actually is a deeper meaning to the story of Lena Dunham wearing her "sex" suit dancing to Cardi B's icky song about wet lady parts to celebrate the "normalization of female desire." Unfortunately it means you must suffer through this 15 seconds of video acid to pick up the gist. I am so sorry.

Watch, learn, puke.

Lest anyone accuse me of rampant hate of people with BMIs just north of "Put the cookie down," no. This isn't a fat-shaming lecture. Well. It's not entirely a fat-shaming lecture. People of all shapes and sizes, even shapes and sizes with hard to define lines since the lines be jiggling, are free to get their dance on to whatever tune they haven't ruined by hitting "repeat" ten times too many.

But the same right allowing Lena to get jiggily with it is the same right which allows my fingers to peck keys with glee. Lena saw the ride and ate the ticket. Maybe she was feeling peckish. It is a long time between second breakfast and first lunch.

Why must we "celebrate the normalization of female desire"? No one has adequately explained why we must "celebrate" that which happens normally. I have the same issue with the feminist notion of "period stigma." Periods don't have stigmas, they're just gross. I can say that, I have periods. They're gross. Maybe Apple started it by releasing the smiling poop emoji, I don't know. But poop is also normal and I don't see a movement to celebrate regular bowel movements.

Who, exactly, is saying female desire isn't normal? Who, exactly, is out there saying we shouldn't be okay with women's physical reaction to being turned on? I can think of exactly zero examples of this happening except in Islam where WAPs probably aren't possible. If Lena wanted to be considered brave, maybe she should blast CardiB's WAP into Syria and let the oppressed, circumsized ladies know what it is they're missing? Just an idea.

As an alternate theory, I think a lot of women (ahem) get kind of icked out when men talk about their sexual emissions in a celebratory fashion. So maybe, just maybe, a few ladies are positing their own sexual juices in a celebratory fashion as a form of payback. I notice the left likes to make everyone equal by making everyone worse. I'd just prefer it if men stopped talking about their jizz and we could call it even.

Until that blessed time, let Lena be a lesson in the dangers of oversharing.

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