Lizzo is a “hugely successful music artist,” a massive success, inarguably gigantic, morbidly successful artist. And because she’s been such a rotund success in one industry, she’s decided to expand… into another medium: painting.

Like many performers who decide to move from one industry to another, there are sure to be some missteps. A few movies come to mind that were just garbage. And Lizzo’s foray into painting will be no different. But where some people might simply expect the work to be sloppy eyesores—which it most certainly is—much like the work of another famous artist by the name of Hunter Biden, she’s decided to add a performance aspect to it, and God help me if I didn’t puke all over my keyboard when I saw it.

Lizzo's Latest TikTok WILL DAMAGE YOU Psychologically! | Louder With Crowderwww.youtube.com

“I thought it would be like, you know, where you do your hand and a turkey, and in her case, it would look like veal.”

Oh, if only that was the extent of it. I wouldn’t have had to pour bleach into my eyes if it were. I’m legitimately scarred for life. I may have to make an appointment with my therapist to talk through the trauma.

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