A brief FBI recap, on the off chance you were out trolling the Women's March this weekend with signs as simple as "I tapped your mom." Do you remember the two anti-Trump FBI agents who were part of the Russia investigation? Lemme help you. The agents were caught texting about how they believed Donald Trump was a big stupidhead. They clearly supported The Devil Wears Pantsuits. Those exposed FBI texts do not include five months worth of texts which have gone missing. "Suddenly."

Not deleted, however, are texts about a secret society in the FBI, with the ultimate goal of taking down the president.

Reps. Gowdy and Ratcliffe have reviewed more texts.

The full video is below, detailing the investigation. The secret society discussion begins at the 5:50 mark.

RATCLIFFE: We learned today about information that after — in the immediate aftermath of [Trump’s] election that there may have been a secret society of folks within the Department of Justice and the FBI to include Page and Strzok that would be working against him.

Rep. Ratcliff also says, "I'm not saying that actually happened. But when people speak in those terms, they need to come forward and explain the concept of those terms."

GOWDY: You have this insurance policy in the spring of 2016 and then the day after the election, the day after what they really, really didn’t want to have happen, there’s a text exchange between these two FBI agents, these two supposed to be objective fact-centric FBI agents saying perhaps this is the first meeting of the secret society."

First, let's pump the brakes. People need to slow their rolls about a "secret society." Segments of America already susceptible to conspiracy theories. They're hoping for a zombie apocalypse to justify their pallets of canned tuna. Their mental pots are self-stirred already, without thinking the FBI has been infiltrated by Cobra Commander, Destro, and Zartan. People message sarcastic things to their friends over text all the time. If you disagree, you probably don't have friends. Have yourself a party, draw some smiley faces on some tuna cans. Googly eyes optional (but recommended).

However, it's clear there are people in the FBI who thought they'd be cinching up their prosthetic monkey wings in service of Madam Cankles, Wicked Witch of the Cloth or Something. If these ambitious for Hillary drones are the ones investigating the Russia collusion (of which there's been no real evidence), they need to be exposed for the knuckle-dragging shills they are. Depending on the severity of their malfeasance, they also need to get cozy in the unemployment line.

Imagine, if you will, the buckled boot was on the other paw. Imagine if the FBI agents were MAGA bros trying to de-broom the She-Devil, and five months of texts "suddenly" vanished. Think the agents would still be suiting up?

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