If you woke up today feeling as if you were suddenly cast in Groundhog Day, no. This is just a different, totally new Mueller Report hearing, that's like super important to our democracy even though we're a representative republic. If you, like me, are fresh out of piping hot craps to give about this, that's totally fair. May I interest you in an open letter to a sex pervert? For those of you who are semi-interested in the neverending Mueller hoopla which may prove we're already dead and in hell, I present to you a clip actually worth watching. Behold Matt Gaetz of Florida causing Mueller to soil his Depends:

Can we all just acknowledge Rober Mueller doesn't appear to be firing on all cylinders? He reminds me of someone's grandpappy who was shuffled off to the old folks home but think's he's really in a warship heading to Normandy. When really, he lost his denture cream. Are these jokes ageist? Yeah, but who cares. Mueller is either the crypt-keeper or waiting for the crypt-keeper to relieve him of all life. Whoever shoved him in a chair to testify before Congress should not be in charge of his final will and testament.

Aside from the totally right on time and not early-onset dementia, Mueller flubbed up here. That young whippersnapper Matt Gaetz nailed him on the Russian Dossier Steele Fake Russia Report point, and kind of crystalized what I said in the opening paragraph: this entire ordeal is a political circus. We're now three years into this stupidity, and no progress has or will be made. The only thing clear is that age hasn't treated Mueller as kindly as it treats Patrick Stewart.

Also, who cares about the Mueller Report still? Anyone? Mueller? Mueller?

In a totally unrelated but more interesting note:

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