Yes, I went there. Yes, I mean it.
Well….. kind of. I mean it in a “Tim should call my dad, take me on a date, we get to know each other……” and then marry me kind of way. What? Every single female with half a brain knows that Tim Tebow would be quite the catch. I’m just logically listing my own personal reasons for you so this way, when 5 billion girls today tweet, “Tim Tebow, will you marry me?” I can just send them the link to this post and say, “Sorry, friend. This isn’t The Bachelorette and I already wrote a post, so I win.” Ha!
And to clarify, this isn’t Steven writing. This is Krystal. Hi there!
Here’s the deal. Tim Tebow’s back in the news and all the world’s aflutter. There’s no middle ground with Tebow. People either love him or they hate him. Both sides seem completely unwilling to acknowledge the facts supporting the other. So here’s the important things you should know: Tebow was an amazing college football player. He had pretty decent stats in his rookie season with the Broncos (better than John Elway, I might add). Tebow was also plagued with a weird throwing motion when he entered the league, wasn’t the most accurate passer, and was passed over by several teams.
Now, Chip Kelly and the Eagles have decided to give Tebow another chance. This makes me happy. Not simply because I think Tim Tebow is a fantastic person, but because I believe Tebow was never really given a fair shake at this thing called the NFL.
Oh, and by the way, if you can’t sing the mashup below word-for-word already, you’re not a true Tebow fan.
But enough of boring facts. You probably didn’t click this link to read another take on Tebow’s football abilities. That said, I give you 7 reasons why Tim Tebow and I would be perfect for each other. (And yes, I’m about to refer to myself in the 3rd person. Brace yourself.)
1. Faith – Tim loves Jesus. Krystal loves Jesus. For Christians, the single most important thing to consider when picking a spouse is that you both believe that Jesus is the Son of God who lived a perfect life, died a sinless death, was buried and rose from the dead three days later (proving He was God), and that all who believe on Him will be saved (John 3:16). Check.
2. Family – Tim is from a big family. Krystal is from a big family. It can be really hard to understand big family dynamics unless you grow up in a big family. Tim’s from a family with 5 children. Krystal’s family has 7. Also important to note – all of Krystal’s family have already declared they’d be thrilled to add Tim to the bunch. And Krystal and Mrs. Tebow have already met and get along splendidly. (But seriously though, Mrs. Tebow is one of the nicest people I’ve ever met.)
3. Football – Tim loves football. Krystal loves football. For real. If you know Krystal at all, you know that she (and her family) have a sometimes unhealthy love for this game. As for Tim, well, clearly the man loves football. No conflict for what we’d be watching on Monday nights. Boom.
4. Missions – Tim is into missions. Krystal is into missions. That’s church-speak, so let me break it down for you. Jesus said that Christians are supposed to go into all the world and preach the Gospel, that we’re to minister to orphans and widows, and be a witness wherever we go. Missions is like humanitarian work, but for the purpose of aiding both people’s bodies and souls. Tim’s taken many trips to the Philippines and built children’s hospitals both here in the US and overseas. Krystal’s worked with missions groups on 5 continents and helped build schools and churches in Sierra Leone.
5. Homeschoolers – Tim was homeschooled. Krystal was homeschooled. This is another one of those things that can just be hard to understand if you didn’t grow up in it. Today, homeschooling is generally well accepted. But when Tim and Krystal were growing up, it was downright weird to homeschool. And we totally rocked it. Homeschool pioneers, unite!
6. Broadcasting – Tim does broadcasting. Krystal does broadcasting. Never mind that Tim is a superstar who broadcasts on a national scale while Krystal’s merely building a Christian FM radio station in Las Vegas… it’s still kinda close, okay? Great dinner conversation, at the very least.
7. Roller coasters – Tim doesn’t do roller coasters. Krystal doesn’t do roller coasters. There is nothing worse than going on that first date to an amusement park and one of the two of you doesn’t do coasters. Problem. Solved. Booyah!
There you have it. A match (literally) made in heaven, huh?! But opposites attract, you say? True. I’m not saying Tim and I are the same person. Far from it. What I am saying, is that we already have a pretty great foundation laid, don’t ya think?
As for the football side of things… will Tim Tebow make it through training camp and stay with the Eagles? If Chip Kelly is able to trade Matt Barkley, I say yes. If he keeps Barkley, then sadly, Tim will again be out of the NFL. That’s my opinion, anyway. What’s yours? Sound off in the comments below!
NOTE FROM STEVEN: I would gladly have the ceremony performed on my program, Louder With Crowder, live, Friday mornings 6-9AM EST.